Making pancakes alone- I’m unsure whether this has been done many times by a happy person, especially in such quantity. Pancakes speak to communal nature, maybe because of the many toppings and variations, or maybe simply because it’s very difficult to make only enough for one. Add that to the Rockwellian scene of a happy family making pancakes together that’s so embedded in our cultural zeitgeist and making pancakes alone just sounds...lonely.
Alone I was, lonely I was not. I knew that people I cared about would be cared for via easy breakfasts when reheating the pancakes I was going to freeze. And my hands were in motion, I was not in front of a screen, I was solidly making- creating. Surprising how creative cooking can feel when it hasn’t been daily, when there has been so much disconnection with physical reality through working behind a screen.
This whole weekend I took things a little slower, tried to be more conscious during my off-hours. The sewing machine came out, mending happened that I had been meaning to do for ages, that I couldn’t find the patience for until sitting in front of the sewing machine was a treat in and of itself.
It really comes down to value systems, and value $y$tem$. Buying dinner on my way home is more time efficient than cooking, and allows me to eat pretty much immediately after working long hours without food since a faraway lunch. But it’s most often a waste of money, and puts the raw ingredients I purchased at the grocery store at risk for being wasted too. And in general, unless Paula Deen possesses me as sometimes happens, cooking at home is way healthier. In the concept of time being money, I’m getting plenty of value in the money sense from an economically priced $8 dinner from Mr. Crepe or somewhere similar, but I’m not getting lasting value out of it. My values are centered around care and attention and presence and staying healthy- or so I’m increasingly finding out.
It didn’t really make economic sense for me to spend 2 or so hours mending and updating a shirt I bought at a Goodwill for $2, but I did it, and it means more to me now. The shirt is cooler now (or at least doesn’t have holes anymore) - and I was able to be creative in the process. This is what I appreciate as an appreciation of value. So make more pancakes from scratch, even though it takes at least an hour and a half if you’re moving at Sunday speed, and invest your time, not in the most monetarily lucrative way, but in the way that will show you the most value.